Famed hamster, Diego, AKA "The Nasty Hamster", was found unconscious in his cage Wednesday night. Due to great amounts of rain in his native Ohio area, a funeral and burial was put on hold until conditions improved. Friends and family of the hamster, including his loving care taker, Michael, were alerted of Diego's mortality and were deeply saddened at his passing, although he was mean, nasty, and anti-social. On Thursday night, Diego was being prepared for burial when Michael's mother noticed that rigor-mortis had not set in, and the hamster had not assumed room temperature. No palpable pulse was found, and a stethoscope was retrieved to do tests on the rodent. Examiners observed a slight movement in the whiskers and then in the nose. Within about 5 minutes, the hamster was moving his feet and head, and enjoying a light meal of Cheerio's and Hamster Yogurt Treats. Onlookers were amazed. Diego was detained for observation at First Parental Dormitorium Roomus, and experts concluded that he was, in fact, not dead, but rather had just been hibernating.
A similar case was reported last winter, when Diego's brother, Baby Jaguar, was found unconscious in his cage after a cold night. He nearly froze to death and though he had been a very mean and vicious hamster prior to his near-death-experience, he became very humane and loving after his treatment. Experts supposed that the similar experience would tame Diego, and for about 24 hours he seemed to be recovered. However, after being released, it has been revealed that Diego is just as mean and nasty as before.