Monday, May 11, 2009

My Pass Says That I'm Working On My Last High School English Paper Ever...

I was given a pass during our (usual) study hall style English class today. To work on a paper. Which isn't happening because it's not due for two weeks and I turned in paper for that class today. Yeah. Not happening.

I really do love my English class, even though it's sinfully boring. The teacher has been there since Jesus was learning English, also my mom. Not equating my mom's age with Jesus there., I was sitting there, reading The Catcher in the Rye (for fun) and then decided that I should probably send an email to the missionary saying, "Oh yeah, BTW, I found out I had an unnecessary freak out in regards to the visa thing, so don't worry about it, kthxbai". Or something to that effect.

Hooray for BlackBerry!

I log onto my Yahoo! Mail (a regular occurence in said class) and begin to type out my email using the brilliant technique as follows....

  1. Place bookbag on desk.
  2. Scoot BlackBerry towards opening of bag.
  3. Place reading material on desk.
  4. Also, paper.
  5. Get out a pen, pencil, or a chopstick that may be mistaken for a writing utensil from a distance by ditzy English teacher.
  6. Now, type out your desired text/email/Facebook status with the pen.
  7. Your English teacher will think you are taking notes on reading material and applaud your conscientiousness.
  8. Everyone is happy except for your bitter best friend sitting next to you, shooting you the stinkeye. But you don't care. You've received praise and have sent your message. Good for you. 
  9. WARNING: Repeat only in ditzy/clueless teachers' classes. Or those who are AP teachers who don't care anymore now that you've taken the test. In this case, you may have your BlackBerry out in the open and share humorous anecdotes from your text messages with the teacher/class.
This system works splendidly. Unless, of course, you have asked for a pass, only to be told that no, you may not go now, and then other people need passes and you are offered a pass later on whilst typing your message and the teacher walks over to see you  to that.  But then again, she won't notice even though your phone is in broad daylight.

It's also fun when the computer lab aide comes over and looks at your screen while you're typing a blog. A smart person would change the screen. That person would also be very obvious and likely get into trouble. The second semester senior does not care, allows the aide to read what's on the screen, and watches with bated breath as the aide moves on to the next computer. 

I should probably tie this post in with Dubliners to make it look like I'm doing work. Maybe I should just do a hyperlink to the character list. Enjoy that. Or not. You probably won't.

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